Today I am trying to make sense of my life - what happened, where did I go wrong, why is this happening to me?

It began in February (or so I thought) when I quit my job of 10 years as an epidemiologist to return to school. I wanted to be a nurse, to care for others, work long hours, be underappreciated and overworked and love every minute of it. My husband, Greg, and I agreed that this would be a good move for our family and for my career. Nearly a month of late night study sessions and stress filled days passed and Greg comes to me one evening, crying. "I'm not happy" he says and goes on to explain how it's all my fault. He had been trying to plan his escape from our life for the past few weeks. I was shocked, to say the least, I thought we had a great marriage, so did all of our friends. This was a shock to everyone but Greg. I begged him to stay, I begged him to reconsider, I begged for him to go to counseling. All in vain. He moved out of our home July 1st, leaving the life we had built together for 12 years and the two beautiful little girls we had created together.

Right now my primary goal is to get through each day without breaking down in tears. Unfortunately, I must also care for our children (which he insists on having 50% of the time) and passing my nursing classes which are run in an accelerated format (a 2 year program in 14 months). I have no income, left my primary support system when I quit my job and am being told I am unworthy of his love - talk about a major hit to your self esteem.

This blog will be a means of therapy for me -- not that I'm not paying enough for those services elsewhere -- and hopefully will help me to work through the hurt and anger that are consuming me at this moment.